This week I want to talk about something that’s been circulating the Internet and Michael and I have talked about a lot. There’s this HUGE difference between new relationships and relationships that have lasted quite a while. People always ask how we are still together, and I’ll tell you that we still love each other and it’s hard work, but what is the difference between new relationships and lasting relationships?
1. After a while, you just get comfortable with each other. In the beginning, I was so self conscious of showing Mike certain sides of myself; my face in the morning, burping, using the bathroom, and basically every bodily function. In a new relationship, you hide these things even though you know everyone does it. 7 years later, I pee with the door open, soooo romantic.
2. The hot and steamy make out sesh, goes away. I’m not saying we don’t get hot and steamy from time to time, and I’m not saying we aren’t attracted to each other, but that couple you see making out at concerts, practically sucking the skin off of each other’s face? Yeah…. That’s new, and it’ll go away.
3. Texting every second of every day? Forget about it. We don’t feel the need to text all day long, it’s mostly to tell each other when something funny happens, or when we need cat food, or a quick I love you, that’s when he’ll get a text, because I’ll see him when he gets home!
4. We’re best friends. When anything happens to me or I have a secret, Mike is always the first person I tell. He knows everything about me. All of my quirks, my likes, my dislikes, and he can tell when I need a good laugh. You don’t get that in new relationships, it comes over time!
5. We talk about a realistic future. Let’s face it, when you’re in a new relationship, you think about what it would be like to marry this person, but you can’t see yourself being with them a week from now. Mike and I talk about our rapidly approaching wedding, our potential house, we even talk about having a family, including a new kitten. What’s different is I know these things are going to happen because we are already in the process, new relationships don’t have the guarantee.
6. We provide for each other. In new relationships, guys always have to foot the bill. After the first few months of our relationship, I said to hell with that, I’m paying. And today, we split the rent, share groceries, pick up tabs on dinner or movies, because lasting relationships are always 50-50, we are equals, and part of each other.
7. The love always has and always will be there. In both types of relationships, you would go to earths end for your SO. And that’s what’s similar, the love never changes, it just gets stronger.
New relationships are fun and exciting, but beware that things change over time. But it changes for the better. You get to see your relationship mature and grow, and the bond you develop is like no other and people who aren’t in long relationships will never understand it. I hope if you’re in a new relationship, you have these things to look forward to because staying with my high school sweetheart has been the best decision I ever made, it’s worth the work and time.
Leave me feedback in the comments, and tell me the quirky things your lasting relationship has seen, or tell me something exciting about your new relationship that you hope lasts!
See y’all next Tuesday!
Photo by Portraits by Olga Hinchman